Day 1254 Happy humps
I’m in a good mood, I’m just going to leave it at that.
Salads:
Chickpea + roast squash
Carrot + dill rice
Leek, black olive + tomato pasta
Soup: Indian spiced tomato
Day 1253 Are you a sponge or a sieve?
I tell you what to do, you say okay but you didn’t do what I asked. It’s fine, tomorrow we’ll try again. I tell you what to do, you do it wrong…again. Breath, it’s not a big deal. The third day I do the task myself, you say ‘I could have done that for you’. That’s nice. But you can’t. I won’t tell you that, you won’t understand because you keep doing it wrong and I don’t have the mental strength to explain this to you.
Salads:
Borlotti bean + mushroom
Spinach + herb rice
Courgette, tomato + basil pasta
Soup: Lightly spiced vegetable
Sandwich: Garlic salami, Smoked mozzarella, Chilli relish + tomato
Day 1252 The world as we know it would cease to exist without this fungus
A relatively unproductive weekend but enjoyable none the less. I was in the middle of making a shelf for the kitchen, suddenly my brain decided I was done with this task. I decided to have some mushrooms to pass the time. I didn’t trip balls (as the kids say) but the world became a little more colourful and my mind felt a little lighter. I will finish the shelf later today, or i’ll take more shrooms, we’ll see.
Salads:
Moroccan spiced lentils
Sumac rice
Roast squash + tomato pasta
Soup: Roast tomato + sweet potato
Sandwich: Cumberland sausage, Asiago, Onion relish + tomato
Day 1251 Devil in me
Another week comes to a close and what a week it was. The devil has tested me this week but i’ve been watching Daredevil and there’s an eloquent priest that tells Matt Murdock that the devil is in all of us, no matter how good you are. Will you choose the darkness or the light? You might have to dig deep to remain on the right side but it’ll be worth it in the end. Can’t believe i’m finding life advice while watching Disney +.
Salads:
Thai coconut curry + sweet potato
Tomato + basil pasta
Panzanella
Soup: Tuscan tomato
Day 1250 I hope you have a bonjour
With the summer holidays in full swing (summer by name, not by weather forecast) the age old request keeps popping up. ‘Do you have croissants?’. No Sarah, we don’t do croissants, you’ll have to take out a second mortgage and go to Gail’s if you want little Timmy to enjoy an overly sugary, buttery, chaotic crumb causing breakfast snack. I have no intention of stocking viennoiserie and i’m not even sorry.
Salads:
Ginger + turmeric chickpea curry
Cumin + spinach rice
Sausage + ham pasta
Soup: Spiced lentil + tomato
Sandwich: Chorizo, Pecorino, Chilli relish + tomato
Day 1249 She is her
She sighs as she watches the sun rise. Dread kicks in, another day is dawning, there’s nothing she can do to stop it. She takes a moment, the last moment of peace before it begins, life. She musters the courage to leave her bed, she’s comfy there. She exfoliates, cleanser, moisturise. She still feels the dirt. But if she plays her cards right she’ll make it home this evening. She’ll feel comfort again soon.
Salads:
Braised white bean + roast peppers
Lemon + herb rice
Roast squash + tomato pasta
Soup: Spiced red lentil
Day 1248 It's not right but it's okay
Most days I scurry to my desk with an idea of what I want to talk about but then there’s those days where I twiddle my thumbs, stare at my reflection and let my mind conjure up a thought. Unfortunately it’s nothing but misery business at the moment. When I’m left to my own devices I tend to go to dark places. In true British fashion, I surround my anguish with comedy so the receiving party isn’t left feeling distressed. You’re welcome.
Salads:
Peri peri cauliflower + split peas
Rosemary + lemon rice
Roast vegetable ragu pasta
Soup: Spiced roast squash
Sandwich: Fennel salami, Provola cheese, Spicy peach relish + tomato
Day 1247 This too shall pass
I’m fine but I have this churning sensation in my gut whenever I have to leave my sofa. I’m fine but my heart starts pounding a little harder whenever I think about interacting with another human. I’m fine it’s just that my body feels really fragile right now and that’s strange because I haven’t done any physical exercise in months. I’m fine as long as I don’t think about anything, be it the past, present or the future. I’m fine and I will continue to be fine because I have no other option but to be fine.
Salads:
Med veg lentils
Spinach + herb rice
Sausage + ham pasta
Soup: Chilled gazpacho
Sandwich: Speck ham, Pecorino cheese, Jalapeno relish + tomato
Day 1246 As the rain slowly falls down my cheek
Does anyone else feel like they spend most of their life being perpetually disappointed? You end up being impressed by the most middle of the road behaviour because the idea of expecting anything more is ludicrous. Such a shame, such is life.
Salads:
Mushroom cacciatore
Lemon + parsley rice
Baked veggie pasta
Sandwich: Garlic salami, Asiago cheese, Jalapeno relish + tomato
Day 1245 Time out won't tell you about this place
If you were approached by a tourist in London and they asked you for suggestions on what to do while they’re here what would you suggest? Now don’t try and get in my good books by suggesting the deli, you’ll have to be more creative than that! But what’s your secret London scoop, somewhere the influencers haven’t found yet. A sandwich shack in Shepard’s Bush market? A studio with a Turkish cafe in Hoxton? Or a yard shop next to HMP Brixton that does 20 flavours of patties? Or just high tea at the Wolseley.
Salads:
Black lentil curry
Cumin roasted carrot tice
Roast pepper + tomato pasta
Soup: Paprika roasted peppers
Day 1244 Karma is more powerful than a Karen
Good morning my little chipolatas, how are we feeling? I’m in an unsettled state of mind. It’s been brought to my attention that my niceties and consideration for others circumstances can put me at a disadvantage. This is not new information. People are selfish arseholes, this is not headline news. However I try and treat people how i’d like to be treated (shout out to Jesus). If someone wants to take advantage of this, then I will sleep well knowing that they will burn for eternity in the pits of hell be it on this earth or in an afterlife. Amen.
Salads:
Thai coconut curry with roast squash
Miso + spring onion rice
Cauliflower + cashew pesto pasta
Soup: Tuscan tomato
Sandwich: Milano salami, Provola cheese, Spicy peach relish + tomato
Day 1243 Ode to my Champion side pouch
We’ve been together practically everyday for the last 7 years. You’ve carried so many things for me, been on so many adventures around the world with me, you were by my side through thick and thin. But yesterday I had to accept that we couldn’t carry on, we’ve run our course and what a time it was. I posses many skills but not one that can fix you. Hopefully one day I will find a side pouch that will carry as many items as you could, that goes with any outfit the way that you did. But you can’t zip up anymore and I can’t lose my personal belonging because I’m fearful of change. Here’s to the best side pouch, I will miss you.
Salads:
Borlotti bean salad with caesar dressing
Courgette, tomato + rosemary pasta
Egg noodle salad with BBQ jackfruit
Soup: Chilled gazpacho
Sandwich: Chorizo, Manchego, Chilli relish + tomato
Day 1242 Never too much
It’s day 4/5 of my 5 day social bonanza. Tonight, tapas in the English countryside…Chiswick. It’s been a great week with a host of different conversations. I feel my mind juices flowing because i’ve been subjecting my brain to a social overload but how am I doing this? How can I maintain this constant communication from morning to midnight? How can one be so obsessed with anthropological affairs? I scare myself. Also, 3 doubles cost me £40, if you want to save money I suggest drinking on a park bench, tis the season.
Salads:
Chickpea + sweet potato with mango lime pickle dressing
Lightly spiced cracked wheat salad
Leek, black olive + tomato pasta
Soup: Chilled Gazpacho
Day 1241 It's just one of those days
I have a multitude of things i’d like to complain about on this day but what good would that serve? While it might make for an entertaining read, I feel it would only amplify my negative feelings. In an effort to try and redeem this mid week mess I will just advise you. Make sure you flush twice when using a public toilet, make a greater attempt to remain composed when someone’s lack of public decency effects the going of your day and frequent a female run establishment if you synergise with Andrew Tate.
Salads:
Braised beans and roast peppers
Rainbow rice
Pasta salad
Soup: Chilled Gazpacho
Day 1240 What do I yell when I win?
I think I found a new hobby. Gambling, in the form of bingo. My 9-5 tends to be quite loud and chaotic so when I entered into this surprisingly beautiful Art Deco hall filled with pensioners I immediately fell in love. Did I win? No and yet I still had a great time. You wouldn’t like it though, you’re too cool. I’m sure there’s a hip and trendy bar down the road for you to feel at home in. I’ll sit here with my coffee and wait for a full house.
Salads:
Moroccan spiced lentils
Sumac rice
Broccoli, chilli + garlic pasta
Soup: Spiced lentil + tomato
Sandwich: Spicy salami, Gorgonzola, onion relish + tomato
Day 1239 Why is there a bright orange old man there?
Honey, child I was BUSY this weekend. I want to nap but somehow I’ve socially booked myself for everyday this week. As a wise Dragon once told me ‘it’s either 0 or 100 with you’. But who wants to be mid? Not me, it’s either a full show or i’m closed for business. Why did Donald Trump try and invade the lifting of the trophy? A true waste of space, go back to where you came from.
Salads:
Cannellini beans, beetroot + dill
Fattoush style salad
Sausage + ham pasta
Soup: Chilled gazpacho
Day 1238
It’s all just feeling a little chaotic right now.
Salads:
Many bean with herb dressing
Mushroom ragu pasta
Panzanella
Soup: Chilled gazpacho
Sandwich: Garlic salami, Provola, Chilli relish + tomato
Day 1237 Can we fix it? Yes we can
What a morning, the grill decided yesterday was it’s last shift. It gave no notice but as I am a prepared for the worst I have a back up grill. Said back up grill had a power surge and blew the fuse. I fixed it. I just need to keep swimming through the shite that is thrown at me, keep a smile on my face and exclaim that ‘everything is fine’.
Salads:
Chickpea + sweet potato with mango lime pickle dressing
Rice noodle salad with crab stick
Sausage + ham pasta
Soup: Chilled Gazpacho
Day 1236 Society is overrated
Cast your mind back to when you were but a innocent child, slowly being moulded by society. Do as you’re told, remember your P & Q’s and respect your elders, they know better than you do. They don’t. They lied to you and covered the cracks in the mantle piece with trickery and deceit in the name of the greater good. And the best part is, if your elders are well versed enough with the smoke and the mirrors they’ll never be held to account for their foul play. Nifty.
Salads:
5 spiced vegetable + black bean
Oriental rice salad with crispy tofu
Tomato + basil pasta
Soup: Chilled gazpacho
Day 1235 Keyboard warrior
Admin, admin, admin. It’s amazing how many people are content with sitting at a desk tapping away and achieving nothing. This is a sinical view, I know many people thrive at a desk I just don’t find it rewarding, much rather make sandwiches. In other news, Moose was given frankfurters yesterday morning and he regurgitated them outside the shop during lunch rush. It was hilarious, what’s the point of having big gnashers if you’re not going to chew?
Salads:
Black lentil + cauliflower curry
Carrot + dill rice
Smokey aubergine + tomato pasta
Soup: Tuscan tomato
Sandwich: Fennel salami, Provola cheese, spicy peach relish + tomato